i desperately wonder when i will be able to write again.
it's been years since i could rage on a clean white page,
spilling emotions and feelings of different shades and hues.
i am a mess.
the kind that becomes so confusing you don't know where to start.
which pile of emotional wreck to deal with first.
i break the moments up like a hunk of chocolate,
but these pieces are not so sweet.
i am rewriting the memo that everything will be okay.
yet these mental notes just do not stick.
here she goes again... on a the vicious cycle of self-destruction.
i need a time-out from thinking.
stop watch pause for my mind to freeze it's horrendous thoughts.
but that's just that.
things don't work like that.
i'm on the same road that goes around and around.
but the trees and surroundings will fool me into persuasions of progress.
familiar feelings of something old and something new.
taking a deep breath
when will this memo take place...